Thursday, 20 December 2012

Regarding Deer, Santa May Have Been A Bit More Foggy Than We Were First Lead to Believe.

reigning with deer 3

This will be the educational part of your Christmas celebrations. Yes, school while everyone else is on holidays ... except in my school ... you can drink. So go ahead and put your feet up on your desk, and whip out that scotch from the bottom drawer and throw the egg nog out of your cup. I just like the nog part of that crap anyway ...

Reindeer ... let's discuss.

Reindeer and Deer are not the same thing. I know it is confusing to some of you because you see the word "Deer" in both names and you think "Voila!! They even rhyme." (and ironically they also rhyme with"beer" so you know how people made the mistake ...)but how many times do you have to be  told to read the whole word? See there is a "rein" part that you have completely missed. Your eyes play tricks on you right? Especially if you have been drinking the scotch already and did not wait for school to begin.

Of course they could have made it easier for you because a Reindeer is also called a Caribou. Caribour and Deer do not rhyme ... I don't care how drunk you are.  Any idot would have understood immediately.  There is probably pretty good evidence here to support some kind of conspiracy theory ... ask the guy in your office who does all the conspiracy theories...

Bambi was not a Reindeer. Bambi was much cuter than most reindeer, and he is smaller than a Reindeer. That is because Bambi was a Deer. Most pictures of Santa and his "Reindeer" depict a Deer. Reindeer actually look quite a bit different but I guess they don't photograph as cute or something. I am still trying to figure out how Disney has not sued all those Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer shows for stealing Bambi. They don't even try to hide the fact they prancing and dancing deer. 

Also, Reindeer are the only members of the deer family where both the male and female have antlers. Actually the males lose their antlers by Christmas time so all Rudolph and his pals would have all had to been females. Wow, they must have been cross-dressing females or something ... but let's not judge. 

And of course the most significant difference between a Reindeer and a Deer ...

Reindeer can fly.

Ok you should stop drinking now and ponder all of this and consider what a gullible sheep you actually are that you have gone along with this conspiracy for years ... even promoting the idea that Reindeer and Deer are interchangeable.

Then you should go and write a letter to Santa and apologize.

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